HASH TRASH
Run No. 1263 30 June 2008
Venue: CampBed’s campsite & Spit and Swallow’s spitoon
Hares: Mr F***ing Nobody, CampBed

Mr F***ing Nobody was so fired up with tosstesterone that he shot off early, leaving Wet Dream, Nutcracker and Tiny Sausage feeling Unsatisfied and distinctly Grumpy. The rest of us enjoyed a fine, well-marked and uneventful run. Mr Bumtitty had the nerve to pronounce it “too easy”. Thats asking for trouble.

The GM - our own, very-much-loved, Wet Dream, got the Circle underway by announcing the usual announcements (when isn’t there a Mishmanagement meeting on a thursday night at oooooooooooor hoose?). He brought Chickenshit into the Circle for asking him to speed up a bit (the nerve of that woman!!) ‘cos she was hungry. On being asked to call in others who looked as though they needed a square meal, she of course selected Gay Haggis and Ribbed for Pleasure. I kept thinking how just one of those guys would keep Ethiopia in food for a week. Moving on quickly now to the Religious Advisor (CandyMan) - who hauled in several Fernando Torres look-alikes (HeadGasket?? HorniGoat??) to celebrate Spain’s victory over Germany. Hashy Birthday was sung in honour of Shaun (as he was then known) Panty Pockets and Bumtitty. There were Seven Vestal Virgins, one of whom was Roger the Cabin Boy (grow up there at the back please). And then Shaun was given the hash name of Flatulence (what was wrong with “Mr Fart”?) on account of his gaseous endeavours.

There was keen competition for the Hashit: - Slippery when Wet for crawling to the Hares in order to get a T-shirt before everyone else, Mr F****ing Nobody for jumping the gun, and Swooping Tiger for keeping his wife in purdah (or was it a Nissan Terrano?). When called on to vote there were huge cheers for Mr F***ing Nobody - all of them from UpSkirts. So, Swooping Tiger got it, and was clearly not thrilled. The Circle ended with a song first sung by African-Americans in a Mississippi slave plantation in the early 1800s - a tenuous link to the Fourth of July which the Hash was meant to celebrate but the GM and RA had forgotten. Dum di dum dum dum dum.......

On On
BoB