Hash Trash 1533
17 December 2012
Venue: The Lactation Center
Hares: Gary Glitter, Just Jeff, Panty Pockets
GM: Cockroach
RA: Shaggy Haggis
Santa: Boxer

Well-worn territory but a cunning run nonetheless –with optional diversions for hard men (no takers) moderately firm hashers (some takers) and the cream crackered (yours truly et al). Some folk also walked.

The Circle kicked off with the singing of the “And the Hares….. “ which this week included the refrain “She sucked on her Fanta, as she rode on Mr Santa.” NWH is a top-security, for your eyes only affair, and information about where and when it is will only be made available on a strictly need –to –know basis. If you think you really need to know, give your name (real and Hash name), nationality, and FSP to Rock Climber or Panty Pockets (if you haven’t already done so) – and you will be subjected to invasive background checks during which all your dirty little secrets will be revealed to the Hash mismanagement. How exciting is that! There is a pool at the undisclosed location, so you may wish to come prepared for waterboarding. (PantyPocket’s email: patknox29 at aol.com)

The GM is fond of his egg and cucumber sandwiches but did the ingredients have to be passed from thigh to thigh and chin to chin all the way round the Circle? Things got a bit messy (it is conventional I believe to use a hard-boiled egg in sandwiches) and there was a danger of the cucumber overheating, but they made the rounds. A lugubrious Santa submitted to being serially sat on, and only perked up when perched upon by the The Cock Doctor. The Christmas gifts ranged from the sublime (a jar of petroleum jelly for Rock Climber) to the ridiculous (an extra testicle for Cockroach – as though he hasn’t got enough tosstesterone as it is). Hashers making brief appearances in the Circle included Slappa (in fact she was hardly ever out of it) Inspector Gadget, Twitcher, Just Jeff, Just Craig, Just Kevin, AC/DC, Bumtitty, The Cock Doctor, Just Scott, Just Rose, Just Patrick, Tiny Sausage and MinnieMe. Only two Virgins this week: Perestroikher, who is a self-starter, and Just Craig who favours the starfish. Just Scott WNAFM be known as Capn Tight Bitch, and Just Jeff WNAFM be known as DumbFock. The Hashit went to Bumtitty because it was his turn. And the Circle ended with SLSC.

On On

BoB