Monday 12 November 2007
Run: 1230
Host : BothWays, at her house
Running Hares : BothWays, WetDream
Walking Hares : StKnickerless, BoogieBoobs

Deja vue as we gathered again in BothWays compound after traversing the mud filled approach road.
She promised a short trail (but with distinct possibities of getting dirty and muddy) and even gave self help directions for the lost to return to the circle. Perhaps the thought crossed her mind that WetDream might once again shortcut, leaving the pack without a sweeper at the back? Despite protestations that he was a hare and therefore couldn’t shortcut, when BeggingForIt arrived by car at the beerstop for the second week in a row, who was with her... WD. And the front hare got lost, and the pack didn’t simply cross their trail but actually reran some trail in the other direction. As TinySausage said - a historic run - but the village back lanes are confusing and fun and who cares anyway. The beerstop was such a success that Beer Master FrozenScrotum had to remind everyone that the circle was to be held elsewhere and close the beermobile.

When we did eventaully return to the venue, the circle in the garden was led off by WetDream chastising LateCummer and PantyPockets for promising to deliver downdowns to the circle in good time - sounds like goodwork ? Anyway, BeggingForIt was then given the floor for hashvertisement of the Christmas charity goodworks , and she gave out a flyer with details (contact for more info) but bring a gift (toys, basic non perishable food products etc) to the next circle or drop off points around town. Delivery will be by walkers and runners and convoy on Sat 15 December so put that in your diary.

And the hares, and the hares ... were remarkably well treated considering ... and we sang ‘Warm Safari’ when Derek asked what was in the mugs. Jesus was upset at some deliberate spillage and back to back downdowns were administered to cure the trend.

Boxer ran but had disappeared before the circle yet again, so assistant trailmaster Geoffrey and hares Jesus and Omission were called in by the GM to announce next weeks run from the Leader Club.

As soon as the RA took over, she had LateCummer and FrozenScrotum in because she had found keys on the driveway - but unfortunately they didn’t belong to LC or FS. DogsBollocks was next for having been named last week when the RA was too busy to come to the run, and BothWays wanted to sing a version of ‘bum titty, bum titty, bum’ called ‘bum bollocks, bum bollocks, bum’ but it didn’t quite scan.
Moving on to safer ground, the returnees Seppo, Jesus, Omission, Wurzel, Wheelchair and CandyMan were welcomed back ... but CandyMan was there last week.
Jesus had a busy evening as he was straight back in the circle for completing the grand score of 100 runs. BoogieBoobs and NastyPasty were called upon to ritually disrobe the supplicant and gracefully replace his new 100 run shirt, suitably lubricated with mud and beer. A quick round of ‘Arusha sha sha’ made sure that he was fully dampened, and the rest of the circle as well, including StKnick who took a headlong dive into a nearby bowl of water - she reckons she was pushed but ...

BothWays briefly stepped back to allow virgin Derek to be introduced by stand-in RA Jesus (busy man). It turned out that Derek is from Iowa, had been made to come by Bothways, and his favorite position involved Bothways - get the idea - no wonder she was distracted earlier and ‘too busy’ last week. She quickly stepped back in to engineer an opportunity to take her T shirt off, even making Jesus give up his newly earned 100 run shirt, on the excuse of Derek not wearing a hash T shirt - but he was a virgin ... wasn’t he BothWays?

Moving along, follicly challenged Wurzel explained that his name came from his long hair, before BW invited Seppo and Geoffrey into the circle again with a view to potential hash names for them. Seppo quickly succumbed to nominations of Septic, and after a few rival suggestions Geoffrey was duly renamed BeachBalls.

The GM took over for the closing formalities, but first he called in Park’n’Ride who had been hanging around all evening saying she had a cold and couldn’t stay. She chose FrozenScrotum and Jesus as the people she wished to warm her up.

Last weeks hashshit was the newly named ChickenLicking, but there was no sign of her or the regalia, and nominations for virtual hashshit were called by the GM, who proposed Jesus - who immediately countered with the evenings lost hare BothWays - and they were quickly named joint virtual hashshits in order that the long circle could be rounded off with the hash hymn and on on food. Corned beef hash in bulk, with baked beans, and raw onion salad ensured that no one will talk to a hasher for a few days!

You just don’t get the flavor from reading about it, so next week try turning up to enjoy the company and give the boss a miss.

ON ON the Leaders Club.

eSquire L
Scribe to the DHHH