Hash Trash 1555
22 April 2013
Venue: Posh end of the Peninsula
Hares: Biriani Babe, Boxer, HornyGoat
RA: Shaggy Haggis
A very competently set trail marred only by the number of corners, the lack of a pee stop, the absence of a formal risk assessment, the hares not knowing where they were going, and getting back after dark. Nothing new there then. Several of our regular Hashers always look pregnant but this week there was a real up-the-duff woman â€“ welcome to Sushi. Did she run, walk or waddle? Fortunately there was no shortage of would-be gynaecologists willing to try their hand in case of unexpected complications.
Hashers cheered in celebration of TakkaTrakkaâ€™s narrow escape at the Boston Marathon â€“ but why people travel from Africa to these remote, dangerous countries beats me. Anyway, when asked to choose Hashers who she would quite like to see being blown up, she fingered Gary Glitter and Sir LanceseSlut (this was the least offensive of several bad taste outpourings during the Circle and the only one that can be recorded in the Trash for fear of the website being cyber attacked by outraged mothers and the Jewish Defence League). Nurse Ratched and The Captain reluctantly admitted to have been born around this time of year, and Sparkle was on a mission to clean up the World. SCGIU Adam confessed that he had lost track of who had paid for sex on the Bagomoyo Hash, but it was widely believed to be Wounded Knee, Twitcher and Inspector Gadget. The tedious business of Returnees and Departees (why do we do this?) was lightened only by Biriani Babe claiming she was off to ride cowboys in Texas â€“ I didnâ€™t have the heart to tell her that all Texan cowboys are gay. Just Paella ASWTK will forever after be known to the Hash as CrackArse. And how sweet of SCGIU Adam to warn her to remove her vibrator or other personal electrical appliance before being baptised. The Hashit went to Gary Glitter for pississtently failing to wear the Hashit regalia. And the Circle ended, not before time, with the singing of SLSC.