Hares: Boogie Boobs, Cockroach and Shaggy Haggis did a fantastic job setting a mediocre run and a slow paced walk - the highlight of both being permitted on the premises of a high level guest. Chocolate was distributed to the kids and there was enough beer to keep the masses happy.

There were too many misdemeanors to recount all. One that stand out Wet Dream calling out his wife Boogies Boobs (who he has been married to for an eternity) and she still does not know his shoes size. I wonder how they’ll deal with that once they’re home? Tiny Sausage got called into the circle a number of times, unclear as to why….I got bored.

It was also decided that Killi-Dogo best represents St. Patrick, the patron Saint of Ireland that used to convince wealthy women to become nuns. Tom (*insert hash name) was highly disruptive during the circle and because of him it took hours to get through the ridiculous hash protocol; his punishment sitting on ice.

Scrotum Scrummer got an honorable mention and a reminder of what actually took place Saturday night. With limited memory recall of events he was unable to explain a certain public display during the Irish ball, he had a woman’s head in his lap – interpret as you will. We’ve been told there is photographic evidence; still unclear which Hussy of a Harriet was the giving party – to be determined.

There were three virgins: Uganda, Dumb-Dumb and UK. Their Favorite sexual positions respectively Lions pride, starfish and on-top and in control. It was suggested that Dumb-Dumb and UK hook up after the Hash but I am not sure they swing that way. Finally, the ceremonial naming of two Hashers now and forever known as Scissor Sister and Turkish D-light.

Hash shit came down to SlaapA and Rock Climber; it was a close run and highly diplomatic decision making process which ended up with Rock Climber winning the honor for being a ginger. The circle ended with a sad version of swing low….

On-On

SlappA