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Hash Trash 2011-2012

Hash Trash 1562

rockclimber Wednesday 29 of May, 2013

HASH TRASH 1562

VENUE: Arizona Grill

HARES: Cockroach, Boxer, Panty Pockets
GM: Cockroach
RA: A very late Shaggy
HEAD OF I.T.: Nobody
BEER BITCHES: Banzai and Swiss Army Wife


Well the hash was small and the circle even smaller. Hashers are now becoming departees before we get the opportunity to wish them good riddance and drink a farewell toast to them. In the case of a Dr. who may have been a witch dr. he even left halfway through the circle. Anyway, back to trivial matters. Do take everything written here as literal as it is always written exactly and as accurately as it was said or appeared. The responsibility therefore lies with your own flapping tongues and imaginations.

We lost our walking hare before the first round of invitations to the circle had even started for reasons unknown at that time and all I heard after lookalikes were sought out was that Salama said it was hard to find but he came anyway. A late walking and constant talking Aye, aye, aye rambled on about a black mamba and everyone thought she was talking about her love life so we left her alone.

Second Cumming stood in as a Rock Climber lookalike but he had no clue about nobody, which we all agreed with. In regard to who is hosting next weeks hash he also did not know. Anyway, as it turned out later on, it is me. You probably will not be informed though as the hash IT department is non existent and rubbish at best. Last weeks hash trash has been with them for six days now with a distribution circulation of zero. I therefore joined this weeks trash to last weeks as we don’t want hashers to miss out on the full experience of the Dar Hash. The Trash should also be read whilst drinking and not running. Second Cumming did demonstrate to Boxer the correct way to sit on ice before being sung to, however the shape of this weeks ice leads one to wonder why he jumped on it so quickly and willingly.

Why was she born so beautiful? We don’t know, but ‘Slapper’ still turns up with broken feet and does not wimp out at the thought of another run around the peninsular on one leg or two to celebrate part of her 21st birthday with us. Hashy birthday from all who were there last night and shame on the rest of you for not turning up to sing to her. You rotten bastards, especially the ones who attended last weeks hash and said they would be at this one. The hash eventually catches up with all of you.

Regular features of the circle this evening were the Pope, the Rotossary and the Aye (aye,aye). General talking and lack of respect for the circle saw them each on more than one occasion having a drink. They still wouldn’t shut up though. Starting off then, the Pope on a Rope was pulled in for disrespecting the hashit, not wearing it and trying to leave it in Baggie after he was worthily and justifiably nominated to wear it.

Late cummers were as above, the Pope, the Rotossary, the Aye and a late RA who joined at the beer stop. I thought this was late cumming at its best but I was later proved wrong as Rock Climber arrived fully dressed for the run after the food had been served. A completely new version of late. So late that you cannot even get a down down for it. What’s the point? And don’t tell us you were working on the hash website because we all know that is bxxxxcks. Anyway, we sang, they drank, you know the routine.

Now the walkers, especially the female ones, were shrieking that they had eyed a trouser snake on the walk. The runners didn’t feel the need to inform anyone that they had seen breasts on the run but nonetheless the walkers would still shriek for a bit longer about this story. Bottom line, the harriettes who had seen it were in, along with Hitler and Boxer (apparently they have a joint membership to the Black Mamba club), and Panty we now discovered had also seen it and was last seen driving off in the direction of the said sighting. Read into it what you will, usual ending though, song and a drink.

There were so few misdemeanours as it was such a well behaved hash that those who hadn’t had a drink were pulled in to help reduce the copious amount of beer laid out on Banzais work bench. A hard to believe bunch of departees including Hitler , Second Cumming, The Pope, Salama and Glitter came in for another down down to avoid being slagged off at next weeks hash in the event they don’t make it. Virgins were thin on the ground, so Aye, aye, aye still talking in the outer circle was pulled in as a born again virgin. She’s been making quite a regular appearance centre stage at the last two hashes. Anyway, not happy being pulled back in she was now harassing young hashers and leading them astray. Leave Mikkel alone please, his mother reads this.

Hashit, what a disaster this has become. It now consists of a toilet seat, a pair of socks and something pink or purplish tied to the said seat. As boxer was hashit last week we can only assume that he washed it and now wears it around the house as comfortable evening wear. Whatever flicks your switch or floats your boat. Nominees for the evenings prestigious award were an unlikely couple in the shape of The Pope on a Rope and Rotossary. They were first in the circle this evening for sex on the trail and now they were nominating each other like a couple of divorcees. The Pope earned his place for leaving the hashit on a wall in Bagamoyo and not wearing it and Rotossary was in for mounting a Pope. Aye, aye, aye shared the final nomination slot for cougar antics in the outer circle and the first round of voting was underway. Aye, aye, aye was out and the happy couple would now show how much they didn’t want this award. The Pope did get off lightly and drank his down down to a note of Fxxx off from Rotossary who then led us to dine on Arizona’s finest burgers after a quick Swing Low from the crowd.

OnOn to my gaf next week. I think its Thai food as well.
SLAS

Hash Trash 1561 (Again?)

rockclimber Wednesday 29 of May, 2013

HASH TRASH

Run 1561

Venue: Hash Dance House

Hares: Hash Dance, Hitler and Boxer

GM: Cockroach
RA: Shaggy Haggis
SCRIBE: Sir LanceASlut

Well the circle opened with a welcome to various hashes of varying numbers until we agreed to disagree on what number run it was. It might be run 1561, it might not be. It was immediately noted what a lousy and lame turnout it was and how many light weights there are in Dar who cannot handle hashing three days in a row. Man up a bit hashers, even Kili and Sparkle were still going strong on day three. Missing hashers names have been noted and taken down and will be used against you in future hashes.

The hares were welcomed with a lousy and pathetic version of ‘and the Hares’ and at the first shout of ‘Howwww Maneeeeeey!’ it was noticed that Banzai was not there. He was in fact outside guarding Salama Stubby’s bike which was still tied to the roof rack of his car, last used on Saturday, sometime, somewhere, between Dar and Baggy. Those Japanese knots are tough to untie. With Banzai back we were able to restart another lousy version of ‘and the Hares’ with everybody present. Elephant Balls had a good one running and Aye, Aye , Aye had a dirty one walking. I did notice when Elephant Balls was called in to the circle that a number of the Harriettes eyes glanced south as he walked in. They subsequently looked up again slightly confused that they couldn’t work out by themselves how he came by that name.

Next Weeks Hash was unknown, due to people who know, not knowing they should have been hashing on Monday night. So a lookalike to nobody that nobody knew was not found. The RA subsequently broke out the large ice blocks, delivered it centre stage and the circle has never been so quiet.

The GM called in Twitcher for bad parenting. Earlier, she had left Sparkle with a full bladder and no paper in the capable hands of the GM and gone off running. Sparkle was also called in for being that poor overloaded girl who failed to inform the GM until they were packed up in the car and moving. At this point Strap On was singled out and her sexuality brought into question. All she did was shave her head. Fortunately, she was being questioned by a seven year old Sparkle and not some lecherous bi-curio Hasher. As was already noted earlier they were all absent this evening. The ice was christened soon after and the singing as always was slow whenever the ice blocks come out.

Aye, Aye, Aye was now centre stage with the GM intent on informing us of a few things that were not brought up in Baggy as some hashers had left early with stories of aching teeth and flooded rooms. It was understood that Aye, Aye, Ayes waters broke in the GM’s bathroom but the panic stopped when Wounded Knee stuck his finger in the hole. GM told us he had the best shower with Aye, Aye, Aye in it.

Hash Cash jumped in to grass up boxer for not paying. He could not believe he was a Hare with no ‘hair’ or ‘fringe’ benefits for being a Hare. Running at the back is running at the back, Hare or no hair. Other misdemeanours included Twitcher for leading the pack astray at every checkpoint as she proceeded to get every check wrong and nobody else wanted to open their mouth for fear of receiving a frozen arse shortly thereafter. So that was it for misdemeanours. On the ice they would go and a song would be song. No. Boxer was not playing along tonight and was just accumulating points for a later award. Some icy words were exchanged and the entire family of Twitchers then sat cheek to cheek on the ice as we serenaded them with words about being true blue and good hashers.

Returnees included, Popcorn, fresh out of a Bordello. Elephant Balls has making a slow return from Dubai (well, if you had to drag them along it would be no faster). Hash Dance who just hasn’t been turning up and Kim for whom I have no idea. This is not Inspectors Gadgets ‘Kim’ but a real life Kim. However, when the said Hash Hound does return it will also be a returnee.

No Departees were upstanding, so it is fully expected that everybody from the lousy turnout hash will be at next weeks hash. All your names have also been noted and taken and will be used against you in the event you are not sighted at the next Hash. Sadly, our solitary virgin this week was of the gentleman persuasion so attention was not given to the fullest degree. For the record though, we were joined by Tim from Cyprus who made himself come and he likes it standing up. Also for the record, it is not just Tim but most ladies like it standing up.

Drinking alone is not something common to the Hash and with a large block of ice available and still not defrosted, Tim thought it fitting that Penguin from Easyjet should join him on ice during his welcome song. With such a lot of ice still available to cool people down on, the circle reverted to the Baggy weekend and brought up crimes of driving in order to fill the available ice spaces. With one pilot already on ice, Gary Glitter stood in for Wags who had tried out part one of her flying lesson in the company milk float at the weekend and without Tiny Sausage being present (your name is in the book) Hitler had to take the stick for the breakdowns, delays and bush traffic jams created by Tiny’s unreliable VW. Warm Safari was sung in the usual manner and we are all really looking forward to the day when Kilidogo’s voice breaks.

Hashit is becoming a thing of the past and it is regularly not there or being worn by the worthy nominee from the previous hash. This was the case today as well. So, with Captain being a lookalike for Bum Titty and giving us another chance to sing Bum Titty, Bum Titty, Titty Bum the gates were opened to let in this weeks nominees for Hashit. They were Boxer Goldstein, for not paying. Polar Boxer, for refusing to sit on ice and Squabble Boxer for causing disputes. It was a close call between the three of them but eventually the GM made a democratic decision and awarded this prestigious and noble award to Boxer. Long live democracy.

We finished with a couple of verses of Swing Low to Boxer, Tim and Captain and then followed them up stairs to a lovely terrace with chairs, candlelit tables, metal cutlery, no mosquitos and a gentle breeze passing through. It was here we noted what a beautiful evening it was without all those noisy unruly hashers around.

OnOn
Sir Lance.

Hash Trash 1561

rockclimber Monday 13 of May, 2013

HASH TRASH

Run 1558

Venue: Head Gasket Tomb/Park Lane Hotel, Karikoo

Hares: I watch Gadget, Deepinme and Cockroach

GM: Cockroach

RA: Shaggy Haggis



Well how spoilt are we on the Peninsula, and what a treat for those that dared for a bit of excitement, so many pretty virgins and more than enough eligible blokes, even our MILFs (madam indulgent liquid facilitators) missed out. It must be a rumour that Karikoo is dangerous. On that note valuables were etched indelible ink, photographed, stamped (sorry that was just gadgets watch when it fell on the floor) locked down and placed into fort Knox’s aka fuk-knows.

Everyone arrived back safe and sound in the dark, however maybe not all in good spirits.

Rotosserie said the run was extremely challenging, confusing and interesting, Bad Luck Bitch noted the walk to be fantastic, which triggered the usual sounds like bull sh*t to me which was a smell noted many times on the walk.

Next was Rock Climbers turning to tell us about the hash (5 days’ time) and duh he nearly forgot the biggest event of the hash colander, a deserve-ed double down down.



A DRINK WAS TAKEN BY ALL IN HONOUR OF A RESENTLY DECEASED HASHER JACK TAR, we are still getting messages from ex Dar hashers who knew him.



RA Shaggy Haggis took to the circle and had noticed that Bagobones our scribe was very distressed, investigations later indicated the reason was not down to the lack of security and safety but rather the fact of being offered so much sex, so many drugs and most shocking having been offered many phones and bunches of keys that included his own, he will recover on his short break to Thailand





Strap-on, the other hasher who recently ran in Boston had come double prepared, firstly she was dressed for seriously bad weather (or the assumption that a layer of clothes would be stolen), secondly she also left her expensive hair wig at home (she’s not joking about this mop when beer get poured all over it) Gadget downed a beer for a serious lack of paper and co- host Deepinme for not holding checks. They were joined by some late payers Sir lance-a-slut and Fat shafted look-a-like Flatty.

Comical or Kamikaze the phrase “Ma China” was heard many times directed at Banzai has he sprinted through the market, he obviously does not guarantee anything or the chant would have been “Ma Japani” which leads to the next offence IGadget was looking like an Asian tourist snapping pictures of everyone, however he did not heed his own advice to leave such items behind, at poo pongy bridge Rotisserie was cheered and thought to be the new International signing of the YANGA FOOTY TEAM, get a hash t shirt and grow your hair long. Then Nurse Ratchet was noted talking during the afore mentioned details, to which she replied she wanted Wounded Knee to book the venue for Valentines next year. By this time Sir lance-a-slut had become a permanent fixture of the circle, will he ever talk sense.

Deportees:

Up in Adam and Just Keith are both but not together (now it’s just getting awkward) are returning to the USA for vacation’s (did anyone mention San Francisco)

Bagobones off to Thailand as a previous scribe wrote” open the doors and find bliss”

Returnee’s

It was very nice to see Just Justin Hoon back in Dar and Bad Luck Bitch thanks for the safe car parking venue.

Virgins: Noted with a very happy cry from Nurse Ratchet she must have a thing for virgin men, well after all she is a teacher !!!!!!!

Catherine from the USA, Elena also USA or maybe Sweden and Sara from Italy who is still seeking a favourite FSP, that will draw more hashers next week.

Just Steve, Just Nicholas, Just Keith (Brits and Yanks) and Langley hash name gunni, who really enjoyed the hash beer.

Hash Shit went to the host Hares for not knowing their fronts from their bottoms

Circle ended with the traditional SLSC and onto the food

Hash Trash 1560

rockclimber Monday 06 of May, 2013

Hash Trash 1560
6 May 2013
Venue: Playboy Mansions
Hares: Centrefold, Boxer, Panty Pockets
GM: Cockroach
RA: Shaggy Haggis

The trail broke new ground for once, and it was a plus that nobody drowned / got lost / knocked down / mugged, or arrested. The lack of excitement caused Flatulence to try and extort a bribe from two recumbent traffic cops, but they only smiled benignly – they probably had sore feet and full pockets. Turkish Delight said that it was long and hard, though it is not clear what she thought about the walk.

Centrefold chose Hitler and Shaggy to be her playmates for the evening. That notorious playboy Bumtitty announced that his playing around had produced a baby daughter: – daughter lookalikes included Banzai (who was wearing a nappy in order to repel mosquitoes) and Twitcher. The RA kicked off his slot by naming and shaming the Latecummers – who this week were Pope on a Rope and Just Alan AHWTK, who had been spotted running down the middle of Ali Hassle Mwinyi shouting “Have yer seen the Mzungus?” Returnees included Bumtitty (making babies) Centrefold (putting it about in Stockholm) and Night Rider (overdosing on Guinness Malta). The RA thought he would spice up an otherwise ho-hum Circle by asking Hashers about their first sex experience. Huge Heffner claimed his was on his wedding night, which of course was the cue for the bullshit song. The Circle seemed in danger of turning into a BG mutual appreciation society, and at one point it was even suggested that we have a new Hash rule – ‘when one BG employee drinks, all BG employees drink’. Any road, one of these Big Gits, Just Alan, was renamed Stubby’s Bitch, on account of him being a bag-carrier for Salama Stubby. Talking of whom – he got the Hashit, for being the Biggest Git on the block. The Circle ended with SLSC but there was some cracking food to follow…...

On On
BoB

Hash Trash 1559

rockclimber Saturday 27 of April, 2013

Run 1559

Location : Arizona Grill

Hares: Pro-Boner, Rotosserie and Rock Climber

GM: Cockroach

RA: Shaggy Haggis

Well despite the weather it was a fantastic turn out, maybe it was some more ground hog day intel that hashers were leaving, now when we look back at hashers who have announced this in the past, we find that hashers are really milking this, so much so that they out grow their leaving shirts.

The walk was said to dirty and wet and too many snakes, Magic Finger must have been to close to the walking hare (Rockclimber).

Candyman said the run was brilliant, then remembered he was in the circle at the hash (a rare thing these days), and noted it utterly crap.

Next weeks hash was announced to be hosted by hash leavers Nuts4Luv and Castrato, “will they ever f**kin leave Tz” were they ever actually leaving begs the question ?

Nut’s stayed in the circle to claim back her lost hat left at Wet Dreams beach birthday bash in early March, if recall that was in fact the only item of clothing she managed to retain on her body after entering the torrent sea. It was confirmed that Nut’s and Castrato are finally departing, Nuts4Luv has been confirmed as the leader for the newly announced project to establish a hash on Mars (MH3), her hash-tranaut training has paid off, she also pointed out that she will see just as much of Castrato from the red skies of Mars as she does currently from here on earth.

Amazingly Tiny has managed to get a ticket with Air Tanzania to enter the annual Mars to Jupiter relay event, bring your own oxygen is mandatory. Tiny also asked to plug his new business up there “Tiny’s Galactical Repairs and Universal Spares”

Shaggy started off with one HSE incident, salamma Stubby cleaned up some spillage with the missing in action hash shit gear, not sure why its smelling of jasmine oil. Just Adam took a down down for lost property.

Pro-boner and accomplice Rotosserie were back in the circle for misleading the pack which side the paper was on they said right and meant left, we all know when a female says “Yes” she means “No”

Further punishments went to Wet Dream for empire building, Hitler for short cutting and Gary Glitter as a proxy Bag-o-bones who was seen leading the the pack, very unusual, it was put down to his recent trip to the very cold UK, so sex every night on account that Panty Poc’s would not turn on the heating and an alleged ski trip, this is just ridiculous, i have heard of tripping on mushrooms, but on yogurt !!

Late cumers were, Skinny Shafted, Wet Dream and Betty Boo

Inappropriately dressed, John the Baptist, just Lesley, Just Judith and Wet Dream

Pain in the ass was Wounded Knee for a well coined phrase when one GM drinks all GM’s drinks

Returnees, Castrato, Nuts4Luv, just Steve, just Judith and The Candy Man, used 4 words to confuse us all

Hares Rotosserie and Pro-Boner were spotted sitting on the beer cooler and immediately positioned for horizontal down downs, by Salamma Stubby and Scrotum Scrummer who used his arm, hand and finger to create a waterfall effect, lets hope boxer was not watching.

Virgins: Just Alan from the USA likes missionary style, Just Kim also from the USA ditto’d the same FSP and finally visiting Nairobery hasher Kitcha Mbuzi said he does not know the name for his favourite.

A joint Hash-tranaut down down was carried out between long legged and armed, skinny shafted and not so armed Castrato.

Convent living shy girl Just Judith also attempted this down down on her own with the newly acquired HSE wiper goggles, its rumoured she is likely to change her trait to wild party girl, amazing what a little warm safari can do !

Hash shit nominees: Magic Finger, Boogy Boobs, Candy Man, Rock Climber and Nut4Luv, it was a very close call indeed but veteran hasher Boogy Boobs took the honours

Circle ended with SLSC

So its a well deserved Good Bye to Nust4Luv and Castrato

ON ON
Cockroach
GM

Hash Trash 1558

rockclimber Monday 22 of April, 2013

Hash Trash 1555
22 April 2013
Venue: Posh end of the Peninsula
Hares: Biriani Babe, Boxer, HornyGoat
GM: Cockroach
RA: Shaggy Haggis

A very competently set trail marred only by the number of corners, the lack of a pee stop, the absence of a formal risk assessment, the hares not knowing where they were going, and getting back after dark. Nothing new there then. Several of our regular Hashers always look pregnant but this week there was a real up-the-duff woman – welcome to Sushi. Did she run, walk or waddle? Fortunately there was no shortage of would-be gynaecologists willing to try their hand in case of unexpected complications.

Hashers cheered in celebration of TakkaTrakka’s narrow escape at the Boston Marathon – but why people travel from Africa to these remote, dangerous countries beats me. Anyway, when asked to choose Hashers who she would quite like to see being blown up, she fingered Gary Glitter and Sir LanceseSlut (this was the least offensive of several bad taste outpourings during the Circle and the only one that can be recorded in the Trash for fear of the website being cyber attacked by outraged mothers and the Jewish Defence League). Nurse Ratched and The Captain reluctantly admitted to have been born around this time of year, and Sparkle was on a mission to clean up the World. SCGIU Adam confessed that he had lost track of who had paid for sex on the Bagomoyo Hash, but it was widely believed to be Wounded Knee, Twitcher and Inspector Gadget. The tedious business of Returnees and Departees (why do we do this?) was lightened only by Biriani Babe claiming she was off to ride cowboys in Texas – I didn’t have the heart to tell her that all Texan cowboys are gay. Just Paella ASWTK will forever after be known to the Hash as CrackArse. And how sweet of SCGIU Adam to warn her to remove her vibrator or other personal electrical appliance before being baptised. The Hashit went to Gary Glitter for pississtently failing to wear the Hashit regalia. And the Circle ended, not before time, with the singing of SLSC.

On On
BoB

Hash Trash 1557

rockclimber Monday 15 of April, 2013

Hash Run Trash 1557
GM. Cockroach
Hosted by Gary Glitter
15 April 2013


Walk Trail
According to Aiiii, the walk trail was too short and simply boring
The next run to be hosted by Beeryiani babe


Bagamoyo run
The Cockroach reminded members to register with their group captains as the hunt for sponsors continues.


Has Shit
Daputy GM Shaggie reminded members that the hash shit rules requires the holder to keep the shit in their car the whole week, not hiding it in the office or at home.


SINNERS
Gary was accused of keeping the hash car bumper in his compound, Meanest Tiny Sausage for appearing in the newspapers, Inspector gAdgets for arriving behind his dog, Dumb Ass for always coming late, Philipa for coming back from Kigoma, Wounded Knee and Nancy for waving excitedly at people as they drive in town during the week, hitler for getting a red card when the public is watching, Boxer and Gary for talking too loudly while next to ladies Bum Titi also for coming late and Dumfoochker for wearing terrible shorts.


Returnees
dumb Ass has been moving people around Mauritius and shifting others in Manyara, Sexy Lizard has been enjoying nature in Moshi while Bum Titi and Second Comer have returned from undisclosed locations.


virgins
Noname Mathew from England who loves all sex positions was introduced by The Cock Doctor


baptism nomination
proposed names for Philippa who has finally decided to settle in far after getting lost in Kigoma included Solicitor, Legal Legal, fair legal. , and legal brethren. She was finally baptised .....proboner


hash shit of the day went to the host


We then tasted his soyer food.

On On

Hash Trash 1556

rockclimber Monday 08 of April, 2013

Hash 1536
8 April 2013
Venue: Hitler’s Chamber
Hares: Hitler, Boxer and Byriani Babe
GM: Cockroach
RA: Shaggy / Slapper

Turns out Hitler should never be trusted, the Route was long and confusing and Rockclimber described it as Auschwitz and said he felt Polish after all of Hitler’s Lies. Swiss Army Wife Described the walk as very fast and too hot… NWH will be hosted by Gary Glitter and Wags with the promise of soya milk and soda drinks.
Just Justin, the son of the late Head Gasket was present a T-shirt in memory of his much missed father. Gary was also given his very own milk mug.
Heighted misdemeanours of the nights run, not only did James lose his legs, but Nurse Ratchet, Porn Corn and Sushi were all late! Twitcher, Bullet Head and Rock Climber decided there were too good for Hitler’s run so picked their own route. Shaggy then resigned as RA for the night after a marital spat with Slapper so our GM stepped up. A drink was also drunk to the Late Mrs Thatcher.
Returnees included Just James, Gadget, Blutted Head and Swiss Army Knife who had been drinking. Porn Corn and Just Justin are departing, both off to freeze their nuts off in colder climes. Virgins were numerous, including, Peter from CZ brought along by Gadget who only enjoys a rather dull missionary. Justin (or Spoony) son of Head Gasket, from Hampshire who obviously prefers the spoon,Sheila, from Kenya a friend of Betty Boo who has yet to discover her favourite position. Wenny, also from Kenya, Hitler’s ‘sister’ who’s keen of the doggy position and Tabitha, also from Kenya (is there something going on) Hitler’s ‘girlfriend’, who enjoys reverse cowgirl, lucky Hitler! Kate from Down Under who came with Scrotum Scrum and like it Kangaroo Style and finally Anise from England who came with her parents, BDM and Bullet Head which meant that of course she didn’t understand the final question, but we learnt instead about her conception…
Rotisory forget her T-shirt while Just James has had all of his stolen by previous girlfriends, Porn Corn left his at Her house and Kilidogo blamed his mother for not having a Hash T-shirt on. Just James wasappointed safety officer and will be bring escape plans and risk assessments to all future Hashs.
Just James, a BG HSE officer, known for sleeping with at least 16 girls at a time has been renamed Salaama Stubby (Salaama being a brand of condom apparently)

Hashshit went too Shaggy and Slapper for the matrimonial fallout , Dumb Fook was a close second for not wearing the Hashshit gear with pridewhile Just John came in last for not having is Pistorious legs fitted.


On On Just Phillipa (SOON TO BE NAMED)

Hash Trash 1522 - April fools hash

rockclimber Monday 01 of April, 2013

Hash Trash 1552
1 April 2013

Venue: Arizona Grill
Hares: Viagra, Second Coming, Wet Dream
GM: Cockroach
RA: Shaggy Haggis


The trail was ambitious, dark, and a bit treacherous but we eventually made it back, full of beer from 3 beer stops. Rock Climber said he could only remember drinking, not running and Boogie Boobs said the walk was bloody awful. NWH will be hosted by Hitler at his Torture Chamber and the Bagamoyo Relay may be on May 18 and 19.


The Easter hash this weekend left us with a lot of misdemeanors including Kilidogo pissing in action, Cockroach driving a saloon car through the bush, someone losing some smelly socks, and Kilidogo losing 2 pairs of shoes (did he go home barefoot?). Just Phillipa, Just Reid, and Scrotum Scrum made up a trip to Zanzibar to avoid the hare of the dog run and poor Shaguar lost his/her (?) bumper while stuck in the mud.


Today’s run had fewer misdemeanors (luckily). Highlights were Boxer for chatting up the ladies (not sure why this is news), Hitler for leading the sheep astray (baaaaa), and Dumb Fook for pouring beer in the valuables bag. Returnees included Viagra and Second Coming, who were having sex, packing, and jacuzzi ing in varying orders (does that mean there were other people involved?), VDM who was spa-ing, and Centre Fold and Bullet Head who I’m sure were doing something fun but I wasn’t paying attention. Departees were Just Keith, Strap On and Takka Trakka who are all headed to Dumb Dumb land. Good luck to Strap On and Takka Trakka at the Boston Marathon!


Virgins were Chewie from SA who came with Rock Climber and Fat Shafted and enjoys the most common American FSP, and Christine from Dumb Dumb land who missed coming because of Wet Dream and enjoys the 3 pointer.


Hashit went to Dumb Fook for spilling beer in the valuables and returning them to people with Desperate and Boxer as close runners up. The circle ended with a desperate cry for food before SLSC.


On on
Shafted

Hash Trash 1551 - South beach away weekend hair of the dog run

rockclimber Saturday 30 of March, 2013

Hash Trash 1551
30th March 2013
Venue: Swigging Spear’s beach hide away
Hares: rock climber, bansai and wet dreams
GM: Cockroach
RA: Shaggy Haggis

The Runs/Walk kicked off
After a heavy nice breakfast of bacons, sausages beans, bread tea coffee juice or was it cocktail.

Pope on a Rope gave a tick for the run because he got so excited and twisted his leg. He craved for attention which he got the hash way. Hop and jump to the circle. Tiny sausage for once joined the walk with the three African beauty queens mm his reason for walking. He said it was long nice walk.
Confirmed hares: Rock climber, Viagra and second coming look likes are shafted
The Saggy Van wagon was baptized “Shaguar “ (shag-u-r) preferred to vertical (cool) willy, shaggy mobile and one other nomination.
Easter down down’s were left over vodka punch topped with an Easter bunny marshmallow
Shaggy haggis updated on the last night events where the hashes partied all night and made sure others did not sleep. If it was not the cars raving and reversing with techno music it was the loud screams from…Drinking competitions or argumentative and nightmares!.
Jungle rumors from our learned friends that it was Haggis ,Ai,ai ai and rock climber had to come in between the rest of the story ask the 3 friends. All other victims had a boll whether being argumentative or not able to sleep or not knowing where you are or not knowing who has undressed you….we all had fun!! And this had nothing to do with Rock Climber and Shafted producing a wicked punch.
Desperate & shaggy got down down for running the engine and A/C all night, it was mentioned that the temperature of a sperm bank is warmer than inside of Shaguar
Boring lousy song was introduced by shaggy and wet dreams about lobsters because wet dreams, bansi and rock climbers found a fisherman with 2 lobsters on setting the run.
The circle ended with a song and the GM giving instructions as to we pack and leave or swim then pack and leave.
On On
Betty Boo
BIG THANKS TO SWIGGING SPEAR FOR THE WONDERFUL VENUE

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    Wed 29 of May, 2013 19:20 EAT
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    Wed 29 of May, 2013 19:18 EAT
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    Mon 13 of May, 2013 21:29 EAT
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    Mon 06 of May, 2013 17:38 EAT

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